Asma’s Story Saturday – Part Two

Hey guys! It’s me again (Asma)! Here’s part two of the Untitled story I started last Saturday! Follow the posts using this label if you’re interested :)

“Wakey, wakey,” Faye sings as she prances out of the bathroom. She’s tall and has light brown hair that bounces as she opens the curtain. I groan and pull the covers over my eyes. I hadn’t slept much, waking up at every slithery voice that slipped into my head.

“Come on, lazy bones.” She chirps, throwing off my covers. She’s already wearing the sweater that was specially designed for the students of Keridan. Its dark green, with a tree at the top right. The tree is odd looking, with gnarled branches and roots that twined together like the long spindly legs of a dead spider. I climb out of bed and trudge to the bathroom.

The hallways are filled with students surging towards the mess hall. Laughter and a steady rhythm of chattering voices fill my ears as I move along with Faye by my side.

“Today we have Ms. Cadwigan.” Faye says. “We get to practice blending in to our surroundings. Oh, how I love that class.”

“Yeah, friendly reminder, but you suck at that,” I say. She glares at me and bounces away to talk to some else. In the mess hall, I see Darius talking to another trainer. Both of them are deep in a conversation that involves a lot of hand movements and eye-rolls.

The mess hall is used for two purposes – for eating our meals, and the occasional announcement. It’s huge, the ceiling domed with a huge chandelier in the middle, casting everything in a soft yellow glow. There are three long tables, piled with food. Boys and girls of all ages sit at the tables laughing and joking. I sit next to Faye, who immediately starts chattering about her potions. I swallow morsel after morsel of food, barely registering Faye’s voice, and follow her down the hall. I can’t just hear the voice anymore, I can feel it.

“Boys and girls, please take a seat. Quiet down.” Ms. Cadwigan stands in front of the classroom. Her long black hair hangs in a loose wave behind her. She wears a black leather skin-tight suit, as always. Ms. Cadwigan is pretty cool and can do almost anything – from throwing knives to mixing complex potions in mere minutes.

“Today, we are going to master the ability to disappear. The ingredients are on the board, as well as the instructions. You have one hour to make the potions. And GO.”

That’s what we learn. The teachers at Keridan teach us how to use and make potion for every problem. It is hard though, since we have to gather our own ingredients, but useful. On the right side of every bed in the dorms, we have our vials filled with a variety of potions.

I collect my ingredients from my bag and slowly mix them together. Potion making required time, and a steady hand. A loud boom comes from behind me, followed by a sigh from Ms. Cadwigan. I don’t have to turn around to know who did the wrong thing. Despite my fatigue, a smile makes its way onto my face.

“The day Kayo finally completes a lesson without blowing anything up will be one I fear I’ll never live to see,” she says. Everybody stops to look at Kayo and his newest disaster. Shards of glass, flower petals, and other various ingredients lay scattered on his desk. Ms. Cadwigan pulls out a vial and pours it over his desk. In seconds the mess disappears.

“Try again.” She moves back to the front as several students snicker and turn back to their work. Kayo isn’t always clumsy, he just doesn’t want to make the potions, so he never tries hard enough.

Kayo isn’t dumb. I know he isn’t. There’s something else about him, some reason why he doesn’t want to do anything right. A thought strikes – what if he’s like me? I shake my head and the girl next to me shoots me a look that says I am crazy. Maybe I am. But I doubt I’m alone at that.

Copyright Asma Faizal


Hafsah Faizal is a YA author, designer, and blogger. Her designs have graced the sites of New York Times bestselling authors, bloggers, and more. She resides in Texas, with her family.



  1. Reply

    Jessica L. Brooks (coffeelvnmom)

    March 9, 2013

    Uh, YES! Already really liking Faye–I am not a morning person and can tell she totally is by her annoying morning chipperness! You've also already got me curious about Kayo… is there a connection? Isn't there? Love the descriptions… from the clothes to the sights to the sounds. You paint a beautiful picture with your words, Asma!


  2. Reply

    Dizneeee (Lisa)

    March 9, 2013

    Great! Umm…hurry and write more! :)

  3. Reply

    Adriana (BooksOnHerMind)

    March 11, 2013

    Really great! Faye sounds like a great possible friend? I hope we get to see her more. Kayo sounds interesting too. I like that you have three other people other than the main character that we can focus on as well.

    Some simple things I noticed:

    The description of Faye comes a little too fast for me. I think it's the “she's tall” portion. Her ” light brown hair that bounces as she opens the curtain” sounds good but you might want to rework the tall part of her description.

    “The teachers at Keridan teach us how to use and make potion for every problem.” – instead of potion – potions.

    “Potion making required time, and a steady hand.” – requires time?

    Loving this next part on your book adventure. Very Hogwartsy. I'm excited to see what you come up with next!